Lost In Transit

This morning I was reading the free newspaper(and I use the term loosely, but you'd have to be familiar with the thing to know what I mean) AM New York, and saw a blurb about missing baggage at the airport, and how to reduce the time factor in the return of the prodigal duffels.... The article said that in August of this year, passengers filed 437,141 reports on mishandled baggage. Or 7.55% per 1,000 passengers. The "good news" is that the number is down, from 8.10 per 1,000 for the same month last year....

Of course I recalled(how could I forget!?) the debacles that have been my lost bags over the years. But particularly irking have been the ones since I started climbing(and carrying attractive-to-thieves gear, I'm assuming).

On my very first excursion where I was responsible for the cooking gear, my brand new, never been used, Brinkman two-burner stove was removed from my checked bag. When I went to make dinner - and we were in a wilderness area miles form even the nearest small town - rummaged to the bottom of the bag, and there was no stove.

I distinctly remembered placing it in the bag, along with most of the other items, because I fit things together like I was completing a puzzle, adding the extra component of weight restriction to the equation. I could see it with my mind's eye. It did not make me happy to hear my partner bitching that I'd friggin' forgot the stove.....

Then I noticed something. There, upon the top of the bag's contents, sat a rectangle of paper. A notice from the Department of Homeland Security. It said my bag had been randomly chosen to be inspected. It also said that if any items had been removed during the inspection, they had been replaced. I could rest assured of that fact, because if they hadn't been replaced, it would have been because I'd have been pulled from the flight and taken into questioning about the confiscated item.

The notice gave me a phone number to call if I had an issue.....But when I went to make that call, the run-around I endured was an engineering masterpiece. As designed, I eventually gave up, never receiving so much as an acknowledgment I was attempting to deal with a problem, much less compensation for or return of the stolen goods.

Another time, my entire bag went AWOL, never to be seen again. This time I don't think it was the contents the person was after, but a disgruntled skycap. I unfortunately had not remembered to have cash for a tip, and only had twenties in my wallet. I thought it would be stupid and irritating to ask for change(especially if he didn't have it), and the better way was to do nothing. A big mistake.

That bag simply vanished, and when I looked for it at my destination the baggage claim personnel were of stalwart resistance. They had the system down. Of course, I filled out the paperwork. They insisted the bag would most likely show up on the next flight, or soon thereafter.

But it didn't. And when I would call the toll-free number to check status, all I could get was "We have no information on this item. please check back in a few hours."

This went on for a day and a half, and since the luggage contained ALL my camping gear(except the stove, which my travel mate supplied....), we could not head off to our destination.

Finally I went back to the airport, to talk to someone in person. Alas, the system is not set up for that. And all I received was surliness. yet, the phone number I'd been given had no option whatsoever, except to hear the repeated "no information, check later." Even calling the various numbers for the airline were useless, as there was simply no way to reach a human. The one option for lost baggage did politely explain(in a recorded message) that it was the "baggage handlers" who were responsible, and that they were not affiliated with the airport, who was not liable.

Plenty of ageda later, I realized that my bag was not coming, nor would it ever arrive. There was nothing to be done but to go to Walmart and buy a shirt to replace the one on my back, a few pairs of panties and some cookware, and get on with my climbing trip.

I was, of course, furious, but the airlines are used to it. They must just go to their happy place whenever a customer finds a chink in the electronic armor and they are actually forced to endure some form of complaint. The most I could get was to be told to fill out a form describing in minute detail what the bag looked like and the exact contents. This would be entered into a system.

Apparently, if I am to believe what I was told, there is a sort of morgue for unclaimed luggage, and that was probably where mine had ended up. Hundreds of bags, warehoused - somewhere - with their person left waiting for the hookup that will never come......

You can bet I made the most of my compensation claim. After all, my entire climbing wardrobe had been lost, as well as all my camp supplies(except the stove which had not yet been replaced). I will admit that Delta(carrier in question) did not give me any problems with the claim, although part of it entails advising if one has ever made a claim for lost luggage before, and the details of the claim(date/airline, etc.). I can't help buy believe that if I ever make another claim, it will be flagged as suspect.

And so - I have come up with some ideas to minimize the trauma of lost/delayed luggage. Since the local climbing season will soon be over for many of us here in the northeast(and Ice is not an attractive/viable alternative), we will be loading up and flying out often enough in the upcoming months.

The article I mentioned at this post's beginning did little more than suggest being expedient about going to the baggage claims office as soon as you see your luggage hasn't come off the carousel, and being able to accurately describe the bag's appearance. But little more. What good will that do? When you are on a climbing trip, perhaps without the funds to replace lost gear immediately?

Offense is the best defense, and that's applies throughout life, not just in football. Here's my list of offensive tactics, when it comes to flying with climbing/camping gear. If you have a trick or tip to add - feel free to leave it in the comment section below. I'm off for Joshua Tree in a week, and I can use all the help I can get!

- Write your name and cel phone number in LARGE print on a sheet of paper or cardboard, and place it atop your bag's contents in the main compartment. If your outer tag has come off, this may at least get the bag returned to you....some day.

It goes without saying to have the outer tags as well. But make sure the information is legible, and the tag securely attached.

- When you arrive at your destination, do a quick bag check BEFORE leaving the airport carousel area. I always do this now, and you can bet the first item I look for is my stove! If something is "missing," time is of the essence.

No - I don't mean in the hopes you can get the airline/baggage people to fess up and hand it over. Face it - your goods have been stolen.(At JFK last week, a ring of baggage handlers was arrested in a long term operation as assisting drug smugglers in the import/export business. Not all who work in this field are criminals, of course. But it's no secret that there's an underground market for stolen goods and some handlers participate.

The crucial timing I refer to is the trip you are on. Most of us leave the airport and it's environs and high-tail it away from the metropolitan area. We gas up with provisions and go! So, if you find your (whatever) has left the premises, at least you have more options about replacing it, whereas once you're ten miles into the backcountry, your choice are pretty much limited to going without.

- DON'T PUT irreplaceable items in checked baggage! I carry on my harness, shoes, and climbing gear, including guidebooks. And my camera. I do check my rope, as I don't know if security would allow it on the plane.

I know someone who has successfully carried rope on, but I am guessing it's not a gimme, and if worse comes to worst, you can probably climb on someone else's rope if you are desperate. But, by the time you're headed through the carry-on checkpoint, you and your checked bags have parted ways long ago. To get that bag out of the system to add the item, you will consume time that may not be available before your flight departs. The airlines do not care. You will have the option of missing your flight or throwing away the item. They will not be able to offer an alternative.

One benefit of carrying on my rack is that it takes some of the weight off my load! What I mean is that, instead of being part of the 50 lbs. Allowed in a checked bag, the gear goes on for free. Carry on bags are not weighed; they are restricted by size(well, maybe they do go by weight too, but I've never had my carry on weighed. It just has to fit in a little cube near the gate).

So, I use a soft duffel for my gear(rack, harness, shoes, guidebooks) and other heavy items. As long as the thing isn't stuffed so well that it can't "mold" to a cobe-shaped facsimile, there's no problem. I would swear that my carry-on has often weighed more than my checked bags.....

And don't put items in your carry-on that have potential for confiscation! My last flight, it hadn't occurred to me that my suntan lotion was more than the 4 oz allowed on planes. They threw it in the trash in front of me. A $35 bottle of Origins. Not only that, but they took my toothpaste, too. It was down to the last eight of the tube - just enough to get me through the trip. But....the original size was more than 4 oz, and that, I was told, was what they went by.

- Tip the skycap, if you use them. If you don't want to do that, go to the check in counter inside. Tips may supposedly be optional here in the US, but just try stiffing a waitperson or a cab driver, and you'll quickly see that is not the case. Though I don't doubt skycaps are used to not receiving the suggested dollar a bag, they also have the power to ruin your trip. A misdirected bag, and a quick snap of the id tag, and your bag will wind up at the luggage morgue.

- Be courteous to those who handle your bags. They have a sucky job. Sure, it's their choice,certainly some people would say. I'm not here to get into arguments about socio-economics; I'm here to tell you that it's not unreasonable that some people may not be the happiest with their lot in life. Perhaps, for whatever reasons, they cannot see themselves ever being able to afford the vacation you're about to embark on. Perhaps they have a jerk for a boss, but a family at home that depend on them, and cannot quit. Maybe you remind them of that jerky boss, talking on your cel phone instead of interacting with this person left holding the bags.... That can be annoying. Aggravating even. And even infuriating, to someone who feels unappreciated....

Remember that these people are people, and that they are doing a service for you. Everyone likes to be appreciated. Unplug the Ipod, close your damned phone for christ's sake(I hate cel phone blabbers, in case you haven't guessed), and look the person in the eye while you're there. Don't be a jerk, and thank them for handling your bags, with words as well as a cash tip. They'll feel better, and so will you.

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My Worst Nightmare - Jackie T Leads 5.9

A few nights ago, I dreamed I was belaying Jackie T* on a 5.9. It had been raining and the route was wet, but Jackie soldiered on and went through the crux like it was a walk in the park. What a send! This was her first season climbing and already she was a burly leader.

And then....I woke up.

The problem is - Jackie T is not a climber, or at least I highly doubt it. I haven't seen or heard anything about her in more than twenty years.

She was in my class during grade school and the first two years of high, and was the "it" girl that each classroom must have. Most kids had the 24 pack of crayons and that was the standard. Jackie had, as you have guessed, the 64-pack with the built-in sharpener. And a mother who made her delicious packed lunches that included the latest in premium brand sugar-laced snacks. Most of the cold-lunchers had PBJ or bologna, or warm, smelly tunafish sandwiches, pulled from brown paper bags, and were definitely seen as being in a class lower than the hot lunch crowd. Not Jackie, who always had a thermos(matching her fashionable Scooby Doo lunchbox, of course) with hot soup to complement her fare.

And in fifth grade, she was the first to have a boyfriend, when she started dating Steve B, the beautiful blond boy wonder, who was bright, decent and an all-around athlete. Well, until eight grade, when she dumped him for Tim C, which was a shocker. A girl, going DOWN a grade!? Unheard of! Tim was also a powerhouse athlete, but he was short. Shorter than Jackie, another taboo. Within a few months though, she had ditched Tim for his senior in high school, older brother Terry, who was...hot by any standard. Tall and thin, with wavy shoulder lenght brown hair and a full-on well tended beard and mustache.... Now it all made sense. "How...sophisticated" we though. She had a more worldy view than any of us parochial school girls had even so much as read about in our romance paperbacks.

Jackie was, clearly, the star of Presentation, BVM(Blessed Virgin Mary) in North Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, and she reigned the entire eight years. High school was a more wobbly throne for her, since she had the competition of all the various princess' from other schools in the district. Especially with PVBM being the lowest on the cool school totem pole. And, even though she had had the top man as a beau, things were different now. He was from the suburb town and not FDL proper, significantly lowering his status.

Still, she was stiff competition, and a lot of the St. Mary's Springs boys followed her in awe.

I changed schools in my junior year, and lost track of Jackie, along with most of the other kids I'd grown up with, but as a young adult I'd occasionally hear news of their whereabouts - usually the bad news, of course.... Like when Jean C actually made infamy by drunkenly running over a pedestrian on the side of a country road, or Marty R's name was splattered all over the Reporter's Police Blotter by pistol-whipping the poor old lady at Badger Liquor, the packaged goods store that was attached to a bar the sort of which saw most of it's business in the afternoon hours(when the men still had a few dollars in their pockets and hadn't...dozed off....watching the football game on the overhead TV).

Jackie's second coming wasn't one for the papers; it was a rumor that rumbled through the lower section of society - word of mouth. Gossip. But the source was impeccable, my own brother Oney. Oney, who had loved Jackie T, and had a brief courtship with her during one of her breaks with Steve B., and held her in high regard even though she eventually rebuffed him to get back with her sweetheart.

My brother told me that he'd been to Summer Stage in Milwaukee, a big event... And had seen Jackie. She was onstage, flanked by two...large...Harley-rider types with dirty hair and beer bellies; men too old for a nineteen year old pretty girl with any sense to be associated with.

And not only that, along with being stumble-down drunk, she was sopping wet. As you may have guessed, she was a participant in a pageant of sorts. the Wet T-Shirt Contest.

Oney told me that Jackie was a fallen woman, how everyone had seen the spectacle and would never respect her again for as long as she lived, and how it only go'ed to show you that character is the mark of true beauty in a soul.....

So - it must go without saying that I, dreaming that Jackie T is kicking ass on a climb I would be hard-pressed to follow, must have layers and layers of deep, mysterious meaning....

This weekend I am climbing on Saturday and even if I don't lead anything - I am going to use that dream to my advantage. If I come to a tough spot, I am going to show that Jackie what I'm made of! And in two weeks when I get myself to JTree for the SushiFest and my autumn holiday, I am going to kick ass like the title of Donald Trump's new book....Grrrr.


* Some names have been altered to protect the innocent, and/or because my memory is faulty and I can't summon the correct one.

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Apples, Oranges and Backpacks.....

I've always been lucky; looking back over my entire life, it's very easy to see how serendipitous events led me on a clear path over the years. Despite many circumstances most people would never choose, I can honestly say that I wouldn't change my life for any other that I have witnessed. That's sort of nice, being content....

When I tell people of the things that go on with me, they are sometimes fairly astonished at the level of good will the universe seems to deal me. While I can't say why this is for certain, I have come to believe that the connection lies with my desire and ability to be generous with what I have, whether it's times spent volunteering with a project, providing emotional support to my clients(I am a dog walker, but it seems the actual dog walk is only a small portion of the job), or recognizing a person in need of directions while walking down the street, and stopping to be available.

Once I began committing to this sort of interaction with others, I started to notice that my own life became easier - at least in some respects. It's also much harder, because I take a different path than one focusing on the acquisition of goods.... But that's a different topic.

The subway train is pulling into the station nine times out of ten is one example of how my life flows. "So what?" someone might think. But - if you use that train ten or more times in the average day, as I do(to travel between clients), that is not a small thing. I hear people complain all the time, about delays due to the subway. But I simply don't have that experience.

Whether the connection(between giving and receiving) is real, I can't say. But....I'm superstitious, and greedy! I don't want my good fortune to end, and so I keep stoking the furnace with acts of giving. The problem is - the more you give, the more you get! Of course, it's not apples for apples; If I hand out an apple, sure enough it will be that within a short time and orange is handed to me(hence, this post's title).

Then, I get that orange, and I feel obligated, because I have so many oranges, to give some of them away....As you can imagine, this will result in more apples arriving. Or some more oranges. Occasionally a pineapple or pomegranate, too.... Abundance.

So - it really was no surprise to me that last weekend I won a new backpack in the New Paltz Film Festival raffle. I actually did need one, although I kept telling myself that the one I have still has plenty of life to it. It does... There are some holes in it, and it never did fit my body quite right, but I like that pack, and it has served me well.

Still - it had gotten in my head, several months ago, that a new pack would be nice.... And so I began to look around a bit. The first thing I noticed was that I would not be able to afford a new pack. Sticker shock, accompanied by the need for a decent fit, made my old Lowe Alpine pack seem like it had plenty of life left. So what if it never quite fit exactly right. It almost fit perfectly....

When I got to the Film Festival, I had looked over my funds and allocated $10 to go toward raffle tickets. I was distinctly and consciously hoping that, if I won a prize, it would be a backpack. I certainly didn't need a new rope, having gotten one from Sterling for helping out at the JTree Goddesses on the Rocks event in April AND a second one when I volunteered last month for another GotR workshop in New Hampshire. I told myself that, if I won a rope, I would forfeit the gift and ask them to draw another ticket.

Now, I love winning as much as the next person, but I also told myself that, if I didn't win anything, the money paid was going to a good cause and that was, in and of itself, worth donating to.

....When they called out the number that matched my ticket, I couldn't believe I had won just what I had been hoping for. I double checked my number, worried I'd jump up yelling "Me!" only to find myself echoing another winner.... But, it was true, and I couldn't wait until after the event to go up and see what the pack looked like.

It is actually the quintessential climbing pack, the Phenom from Mountain Hardware - AND it fits very well! I field-tested it this last weekend, and felt like I was living in the lap of luxury; it molds perfectly to my back, feels compact and well balanced, and has great features. It's a much slimmer profile than my old pack, but it holds the same and more.

Well....now I owe the universe, I suppose. So this Saturday I'll be out at the Access Fund Adopt-a-Crag event at Peterskill, helping with whatever needs to be done and having an enjoyable day with other like-minded people.






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